Becoming a teacher became my goal. Throughout grammar school, high school and even most of college I thought I wanted to be a teacher. I went to NIU(S/O to my set #TeamNIUAlumni...Shameless plug lol) to major in English so that I could become a high school English teacher. For years I convinced myself that I wanted to be a teacher.
On July of 2011 I lost my great grandmother and in August of 2011 I lost my other great grandmother. Losing those two women made me question EVERYTHING about my life. I felt LOST. I felt like I had no guidance. I didn't know what I was really doing with my life. I was alive and breathing but I wasn't LIVING. In November of 2011 was my last straw. I lost another good friend (RIP Steve Agee) and I couldn't take it.
2011 changed my life. I lost sooooo many people. I felt like I was drowning. BUT I remembered the conversations that I had with the people that I lost. I remembered their lives and how they were all living up until the their last breath.
I walked across that great big stage in December 2011 knowing that I no longer wanted to teach. In losing many of my loved ones, I found my true passion...WRITING! I have always been a writer. But when I lost my grandmothers I didn't want to talk, all I wanted to do was write. When I was in the most pain, I didn't want to cry, I wanted to write.
A lot of people are wondering what I am doing with my life after graduating. They ask me why I am not teaching and what changed that I didn't want to teach anymore. When I tell them that I am a writer and about some of my dreams and goals they don't support. They can't seem to wrap their heads around the fact that I no longer want to teach. They tell me that I would be a great teacher and that I should think about my decision to be a writer. SMH. What about saying that I'll be a great writer? SMH
My entire life I let people tell me what I was good at. I let people tell me who I should be, what I should major in, what career I should have and sooo many other things. I got to a point where I got tired of waking up everyday and "living" for other people. I got tired of putting other people's wants and dreams for me, in front of my own wants and dreams. I finally figured out what I wanted to do with my life and I am doing it. NO my life isn't perfect. No, I am not exactly where I want to be with my career at this point BUT I can guarantee you that I am working towards MY GOALS, MY DREAMS and I AM LIVING FOR ME. I love to write. I am a writer. I will have published work. I will write a book. I will write more songs. I write...and if you have a problem with that, oh well! Writing is what I love to do and I am pursuing a GREAT career in WRITING...NOT TEACHING! SO DEAL WITH IT!
Do what you want. Make YOUR dreams come true! Step out on faith! Believe in yourself even when other people don't! Keep working. Keep dreaming! Keep reaching for your goals. Nothing beats a fail but a try!
GREAT POST
ReplyDeleteThis a dope post I can personally relate to this cause I lost both my grannies back to back n jus felt as if I was roaming n my whole life u gone be a preacher or teacher but how u say your whole life u let ppl tell u what u was good vs u jus doing what u felt u was good at. I kno I want to work sports not preach but over all I liked this one
ReplyDeleteDo you boo :)
ReplyDeleteGreat post!!!! You are absolutely right! Do what makes you happy! Do something that you are passionate about! You know they say there is a difference between a job and a career. Most jobs you do what you have to do to maintain a living but if you have a career that you are passionate about you really don't have too many complaints! We get so caught up in what other ppl think that we forget what's best for us. Of course they want the best but at the end of the day it's your life your decisions and your goals. Ppl may not agree for what reason idk but who cares?? That's a sign showing who doesn't support you! In a way the ppl that put their goals on you possibly may have wanted to do it but couldn't and want their dreams through you but it's not about them. You continue to climb YOUR ladder of success and make the best of your journey! I don't know you personally but I truly support your talent! You are amazing and you continue to do you!! Don't let others discourage you because you don't live your life through them! You are a beautiful educated black woman with a great determination to make your dreams a reality. Not like most women with hella kids nothing baby daddies working McDonald's and on welfare lol continue to stay on your grind and leave the non supporters in the dust! Much love!!!
ReplyDeleteYes bestie!!!!!! You damn sure are and I'll be your biggest fan forever...Thank you for this it reminded me of why pursuing what I want out of life is a must...love you jerk face! Tish
ReplyDeleteGood post! If more people would remember that the goals they set are for themselves (sometimes family as well) it would be less stressful when they either achieve/fall short of their goal(s). And as long as there are some supportive ppl in your corner, be you!
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